Women are not puzzles
I’ve been noticing something a little disturbing lately and it’s not just within the seduction community.
It’s certainly exaggerated within the seduction community, but most definitely not limited to it.
What I’m referring to is the clinical nature in which men interact with the opposite sex: they see a beautiful woman and want to approach her but there’s this problem that needs to be solved before you can get what you want.
The problem of “HER” …
All the “objections”, and “games”, and “cock-blocks” are part of this complex algorithm and it can be so taxing that you actually forget that there’s another human being standing opposite you.
Yes, she’s a human being, just like you and you’re interacting with her like there’s an inanimate object that requires “solving”.
Now here’s the rub: by looking at another human as non-human, a puzzle to be solved, you’ve taken away many of your human elements as well.
I guess there’s a nice payoff in the end though: if you do get rejected and you “fail” to solve the puzzle, well it wasn’t really you that failed; it was simply your inability to solve the puzzle with the tools at hand.
But can you ever win using this method?
If you pass using those same tools, you can’t then rightly “own” the victory; it was down to the tools again.
What if I told you there was never a problem in the first place: nothing to solve, no criteria to fulfill?
Would you approach women differently?
What if you found out that there was never anywhere to get? That your only mission was to find out who that beautiful woman really is. Wouldn’t you intuitively know what questions to ask?
Would you forget that you were trying to solve something?
Would you be more human? More engaged? More real?
What if I could magically wave a wand, and remove all notion of “problem” in your interactions, so that all you could see was a room full of human beings … just like you, trying to get along in the world, looking for the same connection, and harbouring the same insecurities and fears?
Just wanting somebody to know who they really are so they can stop pretending just like you?
We all want it.
Then we go fuck it up by trying to solve our surface level problems by conquering the puzzle that is “dating”.
It’s OK. Deep down all anybody ever wanted was for you to be deeply happy, and to share that with those around you.
You can do it to, just stop trying to solve that puzzle.
Jonathon is a senior instructor at the Attraction Institute. To read more of his wisdom, go here